Fellowship & Community
I’m reading The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren as part of my daily Bible study/ devotional time. I started the book a while ago and am trying to really take my time with it. I have the tendency to quickly consume media and then immediately forget the main point or the poignant lesson. So, I’m reading the book slowly.
One of our team members once shared this idea of a “sacred echo.” It is the idea that God will continually bring up a truth or a concept in your life because He wants you to hear it. Personally, I love this: God’s steadfast nature on display as He repeats to His people what He desires for them to know and understand. It is a beautiful thing.
So with this idea of the “sacred echo” in mind, back to The Purpose Driven Life. Chapters 18 and 19 of the book are about fellowship and community. I devoured those chapters with a hunger, paused, re-read them, and then wrote out notes.
As a Christian, “fellowship” and “community” are common words. The big open room in my church growing up was called the “Fellowship Hall.” I have heard so many sermons about community, about the benefits of living in Christian community.
As a missionary “fellowship” and “community” are lifeboats, gulps of fresh water, of life-or-death importance. I used to think that community was something that I would be building and facilitating as a missionary. There is some truth to that. I have groups of students who I meet with regularly. They are little communities that have formed because of our presence in the city. What I did not realize until later was how important the fellowship I take part in and the communities I join would be.
I think people hear the word “community” and think that it is something that just happens; a phenomenon that will appear because some people get together sometimes. I’ve come to the conclusion that real community is hard (but necessary) work.
Rick Warren highlights some of the key features of true community: He explains in Chapter 18 that fellowship has to have a few key elements:
Authenticity - being honest about who I am and what is happening in my life
Mutuality - building reciprocal relationships, sharing responsibilities, helping each other
Sympathy - entering in and sharing other’s pain
Mercy - offering and receiving forgiveness from each other
Wow… And as if that was easy, Warren continues in Chapter 19 that building community ALSO takes:
Honesty - caring enough to speak the truth lovingly
Humility - thinking of myself less
Courtesy - respecting others, being considerate and patient
Confidentiality - cultivating a safe environment where everyone can share
Frequency - a regular investment of time
I read the two chapters and started thinking. I meet weekly with a discipleship group. I have a monthly meeting with a group from my church. But am I really doing my best to exhibit all of these characteristics? I want these fruits in my life. Having a community while living far from my country of origin and cultural context is hugely important. But after I read the chapters, I was jealous. Not all of my Christian communities are like this. Granted, I understand that we are broken people, and there is no perfect community, but I want to be part of communities that are committed to these things.
So how do I go about finding these communities?
As I was stewing over this question, I was convicted. I am part of Christian communities already. Instead of being displeased with where we are, why can’t I commit to myself that I will do my best to bring these qualities? Why can’t I talk to my groups and see how we can overcome conflict, encourage one another better, and walk through life side-by-side? Humans were created with the desire for community, it is in our DNA. Even before I see changes in my groups, I can hold myself to these standards of community.
Before the groups meet, I will remind myself what I want to bring to the group.
“I will share my true feelings, encourage others, support others, forgive others, speak the truth in love, admit my weaknesses, respect the differences in the group, not gossip, and make this group a priority. "(Sadie’s version of The Purpose Driven Life, Ch 19)
